Dancing in the food aisle
with Dua Lipa and Elton John
5th August 2022
You’re in a public space, let’s say a supermarket, and you’re surrounded by strangers. A song you really love starts playing in the background. Can you resist the urge to dance to it? Can you not bob your head while distractedly picking some olives from the shelf? If I am walking down the veg aisle and all of a sudden I hear Kool & The Gang singing Celebration how am I supposed to stop my shoulders from following the rhythm? I simply can’t.
There was a time last year during the lockdown, when going to Morrisons (a supermarket chain here in the UK) was quite the adventure – well, if you consider that there wasn’t much else to do. There was something in particular that made it so special, besides the fact I’d often come home with a new plant. And it was, and still is, the music selection. I am not sure who’s in charge of it but I can guarantee that it never lets you down. Sometimes I am tempted to leave my headphones on and continue listening to my own playlist but then I realise I’d miss the incredible opportunity to hear that day’s songs.
A few weeks ago I was at the corner shop for some last minute errands; I had just grabbed a cucumber when I’m Every Woman by Whitney Houston started playing. I paused for a few seconds looking around to check if the only person who could see me was my partner. And so I started a little dance, swinging the poor vegetable in the air like a stick and using it like a microphone. Little did I know that one of the shop assistants was waiting in ambush right around the corner. She burst into such a genuine and heartfelt laugh that I didn’t even feel (too) mortified. When I was leaving the shop and I bumped into her again, she said bye and told me to continue dancing in supermarkets. The kind of encouragement I certainly didn’t need!
In retrospect I should have learned my lesson that time I performed a whole little show complete with pirouette, naively thinking that the person behind me was Thom – only to find out a few moments later he had decided to switch aisle without letting me know.
But there’s still hope for us, my fellow supermarket dancers. Yesterday I finally spotted someone who suffers (or benefits?) from my same condition; they were trying to decide whether to buy some nuts or not and I couldn’t help but notice they were tapping their feet on the floor while mouthing the song in the background. It made me so happy to see we had something in common! Too bad they chose cashew over almonds – for a short moment I thought we could really bond.
The problem is when you hear a song that you like but you can’t remember afterwards or even worse, when you can’t recognise it. Wait – before you all come forward with your suggestions, I know what Shazam is. But until the other day my old phone didn’t have enough memory to download the app. And let’s be honest, sometimes we’re not so quick to record it in time, or the sound quality doesn’t allow you to do it properly. My blessing is having friends and family who, for some obscure reason, manage to understand me. It happened more than once already: I run back home, huffing and puffing, desperately trying to stay focused and remember those few key words of the song, humming them in my head. And then the magic happens: I sing them via voice message to the group chat with my friends or the one with my mom and sisters. In my head I am singing the correct song, in reality I am producing some sounds that are a 10% close to what the song actually sounds like. The fact that I am very self conscious about my singing and that I’ve always been told I can’t sing in tune is another story, maybe for another newsletter. Anyway, the important matter here is that despite all these obstacles, I have been rescued, and more than once! For example, that time I even asked the cashier for help, my sisters worked out that the radio was playing The Boxer by Simon and Garfunkel; while last week thanks to Silvia and Gaia, it turned out that the artists I couldn’t get out of my head were Dua Lipa and Elton John with their Cold Heart.
Now, I know that despite my warnings, lots of you still expected this newsletter to be about food; but I am afraid it won’t always be about that. However, if you pay attention to what I wrote you might be able to gather a few ingredients I like to buy and cook with. Ok, this is a bit of a stretch, you’re right.
In any case, I do hope that the next time you’re out shopping for groceries you’ll hear your favourite song. Let me know if you’ll embrace the moment and dance to it, I’ll root for you from a distance!